November 21, 2010

Thanksgiving at Work

Thursday was our Thanksgiving celebration at work and it is always a big deal. There's loads of food and lots of people walking around, prizes being raffled, and dessert a-flowin'.  This year was just so different for me.  I am thinner -- 52 pounds down at the time of this post -- but not only that, I AM different now than I was last year.

I got in line like everyone else and got a plate of the Thanksgiving feast.  There was turkey, ham, dressing, mash, mac & cheese, green beens, and cranberry sauce; I didn't even bother with the dessert table.  I think they plates being handed out by the caterers had to have been about two pounds of food -- it was heavy.  I took the plate in both hands and looked at it, and thought, "this is a lot of food to through away."  I went to my desk since I was working on a couple of documents, and nibbled on half of a slice a ham, two green beans, and a couple of bites of white meat turkey breast.  Stick a fork in me; I was done!


I couldn't have eaten another bite without puking my pouch out. I thought about the meal last year and remembered that I had eaten most of the plate's contents, plus dessert!  Many of my co-workers passed by with plates in hand. Their plates were brimming, no, overflowing with food:  turkey, dressing, ham-- all dripping with gravy.  Seeing all of this excess grossed me out, completely.


I immediately got up, took up my plate and went to the break area, where I chucked my unfinished plate in the trash.  There would be no more membership in the "clean plate club" for me. I am a different person now.  I think differently about food, I react differently about food,  and now I eat differently.  If I had not had weight loss surgery, I would never have thought differently about my addiction to food.  I would have continued to eat the same way, and then expect the same results.